Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Little Miss Fix It

I am such a little fixer. Have been all of my life. Even made a career out of it. Have problem? I've got a solution. I think there's probably a diagnosis for this, but I choose to ignore it. I get a little out of sorts with every kind interaction between humans being labeled codependency, but I do recognize that my desire to make you feel okay and happy about yourself is, at times, a little extreme.

That being said, I've spent a number of months recently digging deep into the politics of our country. I don't believe in doing things in a half-assed fashion; I live passionately and like it that way. So I have been drilling down, investigating, reading, reading, reading, writing, talking with others and I have become a little crazy as a result.

I want to be a good citizen. I am one. But at this point in my life, there being nothing I can really contribute to the political scene, I think I'm safer and will become healthier taking a step back. Because I'm a little fixer, I want to make it right. I want to help, add to, control, make better. I'm just a little antiques dealer with a happy life and a garden in Tulsa. I've had long periods of some serious political activity in the past, but this is not the time for it. Maybe in the future.

This day all I can do is manage myself and my health. I am going to go to the gym after a little nap to make up for last night's lack of sleep due to a power outage. I am going to be "hopeful, helpful and cheerful" ~ a sweet reminder that hangs over my desk on a little wooden plaque from the turn of the century ~ and I'm going to focus on me. Selfish? Maybe, but I have spent many, many years focusing on others so I think it's okay.

I'm going to finish this job I started a year ago. The Weight Control Registry assures me that folks who lose a lot of weight often do it in stages. I'm ready for Stage II and a refocusing of my energy and creativity and passion on changing my life for the even better.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Lynn said...

Hi Lynette:
I've been catching up here. I can't believe you kept this a secret from me! Or maybe I was too stupid to find it? I had no idea you had gone through all of this and it is fascinating. I am sorry for your challenges with your weight but and proud of what you have managed to do for yourself. It sounds like such a long haul and you are really kicking ass. I will keep reading here. Amazing that you keep two blogs. I am up to my ears with the one I have. Keep doing it. It is theraputic and helps us in ways we may never even know.
XO

August 15, 2006 8:27 PM  
Blogger Amanda said...

Hi Lynette, thanks for the tip about the weight loss registery... Im going to go there right now and have a look around.

Greetings from Holland,

Amanda Jane :)

August 16, 2006 4:48 AM  

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