Sunday, March 11, 2007

scalped

Fucking hair people. Do they get teensy little earplugs in hair school? Or do they gouge out their eardrums with sharp little scissors as a rite of initiation into the first salon? "It's very fine, but very thick, curly and it really shrinks. Whatever you're thinking in terms of length, add an inch." Repeat. Repeat. Fruitlessly repeat.

When I see my father before surgery in the a.m., he'll think he's got the boy he always wanted.

6 Comments:

Blogger Vic said...

My hair dresser friend gave me some terminology. If you say you want a cut, expect drastic measures. If you say you want a trim, expect a cut. If you want a trim, don't say trim, say you want your hair shaped.

And don't let them turn you away from that mirror. If you can't see what they're doing, you're dead.

March 11, 2007 10:28 PM  
Blogger evilganome said...

Oh yeah, hair. I remember having some once. Now my only hair care product is a Norelco.

March 12, 2007 4:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I should be using a Norelco, it's getting mighty thin on top. I love the bald look, so I'm not fretting it any. You can be my tomboy any ole time lynette! :) The reason those chairs have armrests, is to keep your elbows in striking distance of your stylist's kidneys. One false move and a swift jab does wonders to restore their hearing loss...just sayin.

March 12, 2007 8:29 AM  
Blogger Vashta Narada said...

Mine's the opposite: they never want to cut my bangs short enough! My hair grows fast -- about an inch a month -- and when it gets to a certain length it gets incrediby rebellious and curls the way I don't want it to, or else falls limply straight in other places. I had my last stylist just about trained to do my hair just right, and she moved to another job, so now I'm stuck retraining a new person all over again!

March 12, 2007 12:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

All sounds strangely Manhunt to me:)

But, best luck.

--Freddy in P'town

March 12, 2007 5:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lynette, when it comes to hairdressers, you haven't nearly enough chutzpah. My foster sister, many moons ago, once told her hairdresser, "Do it the way I want it, or I won't pay." Turning to the other patrons, she finished, "And you're all my witnesses." Needless to say, she got exactly what she wanted.

May 24, 2010 11:03 PM  

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