Sunday, July 22, 2007

'bye


It seems we can't get away without a shopping trip, this time for snorkeling equipment and water shoes, both of which were located at the unbelievable (really astonishing) Bass Pro Shop. Damn, just walking in that place makes me want to chew and spit tobacco, load up and head for the woods. Mike and I now have matching water shoes for climbing the falls at Ocho Rios ~ so cute! ~ and for wandering the rocky beaches at Mazatlan in November and February.

I've been trying to find a lightweight, knee-length t-shirt kind of thing that isn't pink and doesn't have bunnies or kittens on it. I don't sleep in anything, but I'm not ready to lounge nude on the balcony of the hotel in the mornings. The only things available for women (not mail order, no time) are similar to what you would dress a toddler in. Not for me. But then there's the muumuu.

It occurs to me that the muumuu is a lifestyle: looking at the billowing flowered garment on the hanger, I suddenly felt a craving for a cigarette, some curlers for my hair, chippy chewing gum pink nail polish, a TV blaring soap operas and a trailer. I had an urge to drink coffee from a diner cup and saucer, yak on the phone to Dot and Jeannie and Rita, hit the VFW dance on Friday nights. So what's worse? That floral garment, which carries the great risk that I will succumb to the muumuu lifestyle:

or pink bunnies and kittens? Needless to say, there's a muumuu in my bag, God help me. So here we are at near midnight. The pet sitter has the puppies; the house sitter is ensconced in my featherbed with a cat wrapped around her head. I'm packed and ready to fly away.

I'm giving the back side of my flipper to the Bush crime family, and I'm not offering those thugs space in my head any more. Really. What will be will be and all of that. I'm going to reclaim my serenity on the beach. Y'all take care while I'm away and don't (**sniff**) forget me while I'm gone. Off to Jamaica.

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22 Comments:

Blogger Doralong said...

Bypass the muumuu as a fashion statement dear.. a nice kimono will work. Enjoy your rest!!

July 22, 2007 8:53 AM  
Blogger Willym said...

you and mike have a wonderful vacation - forget everything but the beach, the sun and each other.

And we want to see the tanline!

July 22, 2007 10:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love a muumuu....in Hawaii. I feel silly in one anywhere else. See if you can find a nice beach cover up. Who says they have to stay on the beach.

Have a good time.

Deirdre

July 22, 2007 12:27 PM  
Blogger JessiferSeabs said...

This is probably coming too late, but I just bought a cute skirt at macy's, half off, in the swim department. It's by Nautica, I think it was $30, and is made of water-friendly material... it's meant to be tossed on over a bathing suit. Good luck and have fun!

July 22, 2007 1:32 PM  
Blogger more cowbell said...

Ohmygawd, girl, you cracked my ass UP with that muumuu lifestyle bit! I can't go for the muumuu, but neither can I tolerate puppies and kittens. That goes double for geese, lambs, and teddy bears. I prefer black, strongly made, Nike "workout" pants and a stretchy strappy top. Being Seattle, a flannel shirt over top is usually a necessity. Yes, even in July. Not that the pants have seen a workout since I bought them, but whatever.

As always, I'm quite envious, and have had devious thoughts of sand in your crack, but those passed quickly -- have a wonderful, wonderful time!

July 22, 2007 1:57 PM  
Anonymous Sewing Siren said...

I'm lovin the muumuu! Why not wear it with a scarf with (3-D) silk flowers sewn to it and rhinestone sunglasses. Retro fun!

July 22, 2007 3:02 PM  
Blogger here today, gone tomorrow said...

Have a wonderfully relaxing time!

July 22, 2007 4:48 PM  
Blogger evilganome said...

This is how it starts. First the mumu and then it's a 2 pack a day habit and your collecting Hummels. Have a great vacation!

July 23, 2007 7:46 AM  
Anonymous tater said...

Have fun sweetie, and bypass the cigarettes, especially those of the Jamaican variety. You will be missed!

July 23, 2007 8:24 AM  
Blogger Ms. Place said...

Sigh. Is it ok to be jealous? Have a fab trip.

July 23, 2007 11:17 AM  
Blogger TJ said...

Enjoy!

July 23, 2007 4:52 PM  
Blogger rodger said...

Forget you while you're gone? Not a chance sweetie! Enjoy!!

July 23, 2007 5:21 PM  
Blogger FatBlokeThin said...

Sorry to ‘spam’ you but I am holding a fun weight loss challenge over at my blog FatBlokeThin.

If you want to join in, please leave a comment or e-mail me. Thanks!

FatBlokeThin

July 24, 2007 11:28 AM  
Blogger SubtleKnife said...

Missing you already!

*hugs*

July 24, 2007 12:42 PM  
Blogger TrixieBelden said...

Have a wonderful time! And just think of all the contraband you can hide under that muumuuu! :)

July 24, 2007 7:59 PM  
Blogger V'ron said...

I have too many mumus to count.

My mother was the queen of them.

July 25, 2007 8:08 AM  
Blogger SubtleKnife said...

I own not a single mu'umu'u.

I have, however, just purchased a top that ties up underneath and accentuates my two biggest assets...

Did my picture change? I hope so.

July 26, 2007 9:38 AM  
Blogger Red7Eric said...

I'll be waiting for your return!

July 26, 2007 11:41 AM  
Anonymous ewe said...

Lynette, i had to come search for you since i had not heard from you on "you know what blog." enjoy.

July 29, 2007 8:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When you go on vacation, you should wear what's comfortable - who cares if it's a fashion statement or not! Wearing a muumuu doesn't mean you will instantly become your mother (LOL!).

You will love Jamaica! Beautiful island, and when I was there, friendly people and lots to see!

July 31, 2007 11:12 AM  
Anonymous Brion. said...

(d)'ja mai kit back yet?

With holiday pics?

BJ.

July 31, 2007 3:06 PM  
Anonymous TedBear said...

Girl, when do you get home? We miss you!

August 01, 2007 7:55 AM  

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